These days are the hardest. The days that I am reminded my sister is not here. Some days are more surreal than others.
July is our month for many reasons. Some of my best memories took place in the month of July with my older sister Shauntel. My favorite, the birth of her niece. I remember how excited she was when we told her we were expecting. We were stationed in Korea for the first time and It was two in the morning. We called her on Skype, and she started crying instantly from happiness. From then on, she became my personal nurse. Every appointment, ultrasound, hiccup; I called my sister. I remember her telling Deon not to allow me to boss him around and he needed to put his foot down when it came to me drinking Dr. Pepper and eating cupcakes. My hormones were crazy, and I guess I became a little scary.
A couple of weeks before my due date, my mom and sister drove to Tennessee from Chicago. It was the hottest it had been in Tennessee for July in years. I would swell up like a beach ball. We took a trip to the mall so I could walk around and get the labor process going. Two minutes into the walk I needed a bench. My sister sat next to me and rubbed my belly. She got really close and told her niece that she needed to hurry and come out because she was making me uncomfortable and it was time. Lauryn listened because I went into labor the next day. My family never left my side. Shauntel would have one hand while Deon had the other. They kept my mind at ease through the whole labor. Lauryn’s birth was one of the happiest moments I experienced with Shauntel.
Every year Lauryn’s birthday was the biggest deal ever. Nothing was too extreme for her. We always surrounded her with so much love and as much fun that her little heart desired. Shauntel was always there. We would stay up late searching Pinterest for ideas and we buy the biggest cake because after the party, the two of us would binge on cake and ice cream while watching reruns of Scandal or First 48. That was our celebration for another great year.
July is the month I miss her the most. I have friends and I have family, but I don’t have my big sis. With all that is going on this is the one feeling that will cancel my whole day. I miss my bestie. This is hard, but it’s a challenge I won’t yield to.
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