So don't take it so personal 😉
Some moments are harder than others, but when the moment passes, I feel that it shouldn’t be as bad the next time it hits. It being grief. I believe everyone has a role and my sister’s role will never be filled or replaced. I feel that way about anyone that is close to me. We are all individuals. My sister’s role was extensive. Granted, I have wonderful people in my life, it is an adjustment to go on each day knowing I can’t facetime her and recap the latest episode of How to Get Away with Murder. I send her emails all the time. I just wish she could reply… The reminders of her not being here are stronger on some days. Today for instance, I wanted to call her and ask about a bump on my shoulder. Crazy right? Well, that is what some of our conversations consisted of. I would take a picture of a random body part and I thought she could assess it through the phone. She hated that too lol
On the days I want to just crawl in bed and listen to one of the playlists she sent me a while back, I get a reminder that I will be ok. I was going through my wallet and found my very first Starbucks card she gave me. She would reload it regularly to keep me from going to prison because of lack of caffeine. I can’t use that card or the APP here in Korea, but I did have a laugh thinking about how this gesture kept me off the First 48. I purchased my coffee today and took the time to organize quite a few things for the nonprofit. I organized quite a bit to be honest.
My previous post is an old journal entry from earlier this year. I shared it with a friend who suggested I post it on the blog. You never know who you can reach and how they may be inspired to seek help. I know for a fact it did help at least one person because we went journal shopping the other day.
I am looking forward to game night tonight and the tomfoolery that is going to come with it. I need that right about now. It will be fun, and I know that I will be ok.
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